Oh, Mista (B)lack President, the first and onliest one, Neo for Niggas…I feel so much better about myself now that you in the White House.  I knows that you the President for ALLS the people, but I can just feel that special feeling you have for us every time I see you camel walk through the Rose Garden.

Though people been complaining about what you HAVEN’T done for us here at home, you jes showed ’em wit your new domestic plan that added 35,000 new jobs for us. Sure, we gots to gots ta go Afghanistan, but hell, work is work, you feel me?!

So’, we gots to dig some ditches and might could catch some shrapnel in our azzes… at least we get some paper, plus 4 hots and a cot up in that bitch. Fo’rilla’, they say it ain’t much different than South Central on a Saturday night…’cept for the dry heat and the mouse-sized mosqutoes. But shit, that’s what guns are fo’!

Yes Lawd, you does look good in a suit and I feel your niggerish, cocky pimp-stride as you head toward the podium to talk that regal shit you talk. You ain’t carryin’ a tray and “fuck all ya’ll that think I should” is what you announce with each step.  “I AM the Leader of the Free Muthafuckin’ World BITCHES!”  and the hell if you don’t look the part.

There are times I must say, when your words, like the barbed wire ’round my back fence, leave me feeling knotty and all fuzzy in my dome piece.  But chu know, I take that as mainly my ig’nance of big things like strutural poverty, wars and genocide.

Not to complain, homie, but I swear I wished you’d put yo’ black glove on pushed jes’ a little harder on that health care shitty. I mean, my granny look like she got elephantiasis, her ankles are so GOT-damned big… AND she got what they call a “heart murmur.” Imagine that: like a heart can talk or somethin’. I tell you this medicine shit is complicated.

One thing I can’t rightly understand is how, if we truly are the greatest country on the planet, how come other countries have better, cheaper healthcare and dey live longer?! I saw parts of that medical movie by that bitch-type mu’fucka, Michael Moore, that showed how England, France and even muthafuckin’ Cuba(!) got health care that puts our shit to shame!! (I thought them fools jes played baseball and shit?!)

I mean, it costs a grand now just to take an ambalance to the hospital; in Europe, its like a cab ride. And those EU niggas live longer and some say betta. At least they not so fat.  I mean, Mr. Prez, why can’t we have what they have…or betta?! If we the best, our healthcare should be better, shouldn’t it??!!

But I know tho’ bro: first things first.  We gots to take care of Wall Street, the banks and shit, the credit card companies, cuz we is relying on them to give us that credit and that paper. I mean, where would we be without credit cards? I know I would be fucked up if I couldn’t charge all of my essentials to that plastic panacea?! Shit, I’d be fucked. And hell, a little interest is a small price to pay to get the really important things – like Xbox, Quiet Storm cd’s, diapers, formula, tuition – paid up and paid out. That shit is the real safety net a nigga needs in the 21st, right Prez??

If this Afghan thing don’t don’t work out though – I had a hernia operation and my sugar is bad – what I’m gon’ do? The rec center just closed down cuz of budget cuts and the Boys Club is busting at the seams. The good news is that they gon’ open a new detention facility on the outskirts of town and they might take me, hernia or no hernia. They gotta lotta beds up in that bitch so they gonna have a lot of jobs.

Still, I gotta funny feeling. Really, I’m scared. I’m going to church mo’ and mo’ and that helps. Like Phillip Bailey sung, “Keep—your—-head—to—tha—SKYYYYYY!!!” I’m doing it, boss! I’m keeping my head up, my fist down and banking my faith in the man upstairs and in you, brotha! I know you got our back.

Its kinda like what Michael Corleone said in the Godfather Part II: “keep your friends close and your enemies closer.” I know thas’ why you got all those slew-footed demons and shystie muthafuckas up next to you. You wanna know how they think/what they gonna do – like Hyman Roth, when you told him you wanted to rock Pantangeli. That nigga didn’t know if he was comin’ or goin’…and you pumped the steel in that bitch in the end.

I can’t wait until you paint the White House B-L-A-C-K!! All of us waitin’ for that, waitin’ fo’ yo’ signal. We gonna march on the White House with Rev. Wright. Yea, everybody knows that lil skirmish was all pre-planned to throw the Devil off yo’ Afrocentrc scent. Yep, the Rev. got his youth brigade of Afro-wearing fist pumping Panthers ready to spout Mao and feed chicken wings to Michelle on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial.

Stay black, Prez, and keep bein’ that Supa Spook by the door. We know the signal to Go Black is comin’ and we’ll be ready.


A True Believer