In light of the all the media buzz about Good Morning America host Robin Roberts publicly announcing her same-sex relationship (here), and in the wake of the Duck Dynasty Phil Robertson controversy (here), I wondered to myself: “why are we as a society so fascinated in who’s f*cking who!?”
There are numerous media outlets, from TMZ to Bossip, which feeds our cravenous appetites for such information gossip. Although there is nothing constructive, let alone enlightening, by nurturing and feeding this addiction to spy into other people’s lives, celebrities or not, these latest round of media stories did conceive this question for my consideration: “what is more detrimental to the Black community: gay marriage or interracial marriage?”
In an effort to legitimize their cause, one of the arguments proponents for gay marriage use is to compare their struggle to the fight for the legalization of interracial marriage. This is a similar tactic used by those who are fighting for gay rights, to compare it to the (continuing) struggle for civil and human rights of those with black skins. I discussed my feelings on that issue previously: “Is Gay the new Black?”
I recently had this discussion with a friend who was ranting that about how one the main ways the morals of society was being undermined, was by the cultural shift that has become more accepting of homosexuals. We’ve also had numerous discussions on a variety of strategies to empower the Black community. We both agree that everything starts with the Black family. Ironically, this is a black man who is married to a white woman.
Me: How many gay couples do you know?
Him: A couple maybe
Me: How many black people do you know who are in interracial relationships?
Him: Too many to count
Me: What more undermines the development of the Black family and the progress of the Black community: gay marriage or interracial marriage?”
Him: (silence)
Regardless of my personal and political beliefs on gay and interracial marriage, both in their owns ways, undermines the development of a strong Black family, which is the foundation of a strong Black community. However, the latter being more prevalent and acceptable, makes it more detrimental to the progress of the Black community.
What we need to do as a people is not spend our time and energy focussing on “who’s zoomin’ whom”, but on building, nurturing and developing, positive, respectful, life affirming relationships among and between black men and women, so as to lay a solid foundation of the Black family, upon which the Black community can firmly stand.
“Family, is it politically incorrect for a Black man to say that Black men should marry Black women and that we should be deeply concerned about the effeminization of the Black male? Is it strange to be alarmed about the erosion of whatever values our communities once possessed that held those communities together even in the worst of times? If so, I suppose that I stand on the outside looking in. When I see so many prominent Black men sporting non-Black women on their side and see a strong looking Black man in a dress with high heels and curlers, to me it is a cause of disgust and alarm. And I am not shy about saying it. Is that what our Ancestors survived enslavement and colonization for? My god, what is happening to us?” Runoko Rashidi
afrospear.wordpress.com 
Dang, i thought that the important thing is to build a strong human community? All of our roots evolved in Africa, the only way to date or marry outside of our origin is to go outside of our species. The gay family members that i know were born that way; would you have them live a lie? I am a northern european mongrel (swede, Scottish, German, Irish) but my second wife was Afro-italian (i lost her to cancer) we loved each other deeply. That is what is important, LOVE and Respect, everything else is secondary in the extreme.Back in the 1970s, we mostly had to contend with White Rednecks, If she had lived, would we have to contend with Black Rednecks today?
Point well taken, however, the simply reality is that there is not enough natural resources on Earth to go around. Manipulation is an illegitimate use of power and we are constantly being manipulated by those whom have the power and influence to divide us into tribes in order to maintain control over us.
We need to build down our population to fit the finite resources of our planet. When i was young (1968) we spoke of ZPG, and had teach-ins about Zero Population Growth, and we vowed to replace our selves only; of my friends, i am the only one that kept the pledge. I do not know how we are going to arrive at balance. We are, at least, talking about it and that makes me hopeful. As for me and my house; we will marry whomever we love. Justice and peace to all.
We can still be a strong community even if we do marry outside our ethnicity or sex/gender. This is a capitalist society. No matter how “together” we are, if we are not controlling OUR media, education, finance, we will be forever lost. We spend so much of our time worrying about others when we need to get a grip on our own issues. Imagine if we had our own schools, banks, black-owned media, stores, and we actually supported those businesses. We would be stronger as a community and have more say of what is happening in our name. This is not a competition to see who is the most oppressed. Making a comparison between different struggles does not mean that one is greater than the other. Unless you are a white, able-bodied, rich, straight, conservative, male, there is a good chance you are oppressed in this society in one way or another. If we keep fighting each other, THEY WIN.